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4.5.18

Anxiety online

We see it every so often: a note from a blogger on Instagram that this is “not my real life” or “don’t judge your real life based on someone else’s styled-up life”. We think it’s great that bloggers are taking that approach from time to time, especially thinking of how many very young women are active on the platform.

Wellness figures have taken things a step further. Since emotional health and mind/body topics have become increasingly relevant in our world of wellness (an evolution from the more physical topics of good sweats and good eats only), so many health leaders on the ‘gram have opened up about their real-life, not as photogenic moments of anxiety, stress and drama.

We’re spotlighting a couple of women in wellness we know, love and admire and are sharing their recent posts below. Social media should be used to help us feel more connected, not more alienated in our ongoing journey to live well.

What do you think about this trend toward transparency?

Ella Mills|London-based food empress behind Deliciously Ella has been discussing the overwhelm that comes with being a new business owner…

“Every time time I tried to drift off last night I’d have a pang of fear and anxiety that shot through me like a bolt. My head felt more full of worries than I’ve felt in a long time. Its strange as in many ways I feel more settled and grounded than I ever have in my life. I’m getting to a place where I genuinely understand who I am and in creating a life with Matt I’ve learnt so much more about love, kindness and openness, and that’s shifted my whole way of being to a much deeper sense of gratitude. Yet, every now and again, the fear of not doing things well enough comes creeping in and I can’t help but wonder whether I’m being a good enough wife, sister, friend and daughter, let alone a good enough leader and business woman. I share this not because I’m searching for validation, I know that only I can do that and that happiness is found within ourselves, but because I want to highlight that everyone has their ups and downs and that social media doesn’t always reflect this. I’m apprehensive at times to share when I’ve had these moments and the reasons behind them but this morning it felt important to share because sometimes I think in always keeping these feelings private it only exacerbates the fear that we’re not as good as the people around us – we can see ourselves as the flawed, failing ones and others as the carefree ones when in fact they may well feel the same way, and I think this is especially true when we’re connecting with people through a screen. We’re all human, we all have these moments and we all need to know that that’s okay.”  SEE MORE

Tara Stiles| The yogi entrepreneur behind Strala Yoga, new mom and New Yorker is opening up on juggling big ideas and even bigger feels…

“Mike took this pic of me yesterday and said this is me in melt down mode. I have learned to lean onto melt downs & know that they are like storms clearing the sky and creating space for something true on the other side. Inspired by @deliciouslyella who shared her anxiety recently and also reflecting on how we really don’t share these kinds of moments in a world of over sharing or hyper selected sharing and maybe it’s valuable to find a middle ground where real connection is possible.

Everything is great and I’m in awe of where I am in my life, but the melt downs still show up and if they didn’t I would be concerned. A pain in my neck I’m stretching out here is the affect of taking a lot of time on a new book idea. The concept is big for me and I feel the weight of it and I am in the “want to get it right” mode. Also Daisy is just so awesome and I feel more decisions coming up like where to find more nature, school choices, travel choices and things. It’s all lovely it just looks like this, not a glossy pic in dancer pose.” SEE MORE

Jen Gotch| Founder of Bando – and frequently one of the most animated Instagrams in our feed – recently opened up on The Bulletproof Podcast about her ongoing struggles with depression and anxiety…

Less than 48 hours ago I was at a solid 7 – and just like that today I find myself in the low 4’s. Tearful, angry, foggy, self loathing, sluggish and frustrated. I know I’m in the 4’s not the 2’s because of the anger and frustration. In the 2’s there is more of an absence of all emotion. So by 9:30 I had already told myself to F-OFF about 13 times and then backed that up with specific criticisms about how I spend my time, why I am a failure, my thighs, my skin, my mind. And let me tell you. I am very very convincing. If a friend presented me with these same feelings and emotions I would hug her, be gentle with her and give her permission to lay still and quiet her mind. But with myself it’s like going into battle with my most detested enemy. I hate that I’m here today. Well, annoyed really. It will get in the way of my productivity, my long list of things I wanted to accomplish today and more than anything else it feels like a personal failure. I couldn’t keep myself well and functioning. Like I was effortlessly treading water and then, out of nowhere, my legs gave out, my arms gave out and I didn’t have enough strength to keep my head above water. It’s another lie I tell myself. It’s my fault. I did this. But I didn’t. True my thoughts and behaviors can contribute, but also it happens, without warning, and the only thing I can control is how I deal with it when it appears. I’ll keep you posted. SEE MORE

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