As celeb holistic health coach, Koya Webb says below, many of life’s big changes are celebrated, but others are far more difficult and too often we deal with them alone.
Lately, the world has been churning with change and that has left some of us grasping for tools and the strength to adjust in good emotional, physical and mental health.
We loved learning through this toolkit inspired by Koya’s timely new book, Let Your Fears Make You Fierce…
A Tool Kit for Dealing With Tough Changes
Life is filled with major changes. There are the changes we look forward to – such as turning the magical age of 18, moving into a new home you love, or a long-awaited pregnancy. And sometimes, the changes are a bit tougher. Whether experiencing a job loss, income decrease, a death or health concerns for yourself or a loved one – our lives are often marked by tough changes.
I remember when I experienced a major change in the form of what could’ve been a career-ending track injury. At the time, I was at the peak of my career and even had a chance of going to the Olympics. Track and field was what I ate, slept and breathed; so much of my identity was tied to the sport. And thus, when I found myself sidelined, I was heartbroken. What if I can never run track again? What am I going to do with my life? What is my purpose? How do I move forward from here?
The often-quoted phrase, “The only thing that is constant is change,” is meant to remind us that change is inevitable. Unfortunately for many of us, simply knowing that change is inescapable doesn’t magically make it easy.
Perhaps you’ve found yourself in the middle of a tough change and are wondering “what now?”. While there is no magic pill to instantly feel better – there are steps you can take that will help you turn your lemons into the finest lemon cake. Here is what I recommend that you add to your self-care toolkit to deal with tough changes.
Journaling: It’s important that you continuously take the time to acknowledge that things are changing and don’t try to force yourself to “get over it.” To do so, journal daily to check in on yourself. Reflect and self-assess: How do you feel? What is coming up (Fear? Insecurities? Excitement? Loneliness?)? What does your body need (stillness is an okay option)? What does your mind require? How can you feel more spiritually connected? Changes in our lives require that we make a practice of self-assessing and reflecting to ensure we don’t deny the past and that we stay connected to how to prepare for a new future.
Meditation: Tough life changes tend to bring with them a lot of fear-based thinking. Feelings of anxiety, stress, anger and frustrations arise. The feelings are normal but instead of acting on the feelings, meditation offers you a tool to increase your self-awareness around the emotions that come up. Eventually, you’ll be able to observe when a fear-based thought that doesn’t serve you arises and choose a more high-frequency response. Meditation also provides a moment to connect to Source Energy of Spirit, which helps give people a sense of solace in the storm of change.
Movement: I credit yoga for helping me turn the corner on my healing. Over several long, difficult months of pain and doubt, a regular yoga practice helped me find strength and flexibility in my body, gain confidence and emotional resilience, and reconnect with my spiritual side. Movement – whether yoga, dance or cardio workouts – offers a powerful way to get out of the mind and into the body. Movement has also been proven to reduce depressive symptoms. So, yes, turn on the tunes and flow!
Breathwork: A bit newer to the wellness scene, Breathwork is any set of breathing techniques or exercises that help reduce stress. By helping people work through blocked emotions or energy, exercises such as Holotropic or Rebirthing breathwork can be beneficial in helping relieve tension and reducing anxiety. In fact, I’ve found breakthrough to be one of the most beneficial tools added to my self-care regimen for its ability to help heal trauma and repressed emotions – many of which come up during periods of tough change.
Open Yourself Up To A New Dream: Change can be devastating. We become some married to our expectations for how our life is going to turn out, that it’s not always easy to shift that vision. However, once we give ourselves time to mourn what has left us, it’s important that we create a new vision based on what cards are now on the table. This doesn’t invalidate your ideal vision, but it allows you to shift into alignment with what beauty can still unfold in your life.
more Resources to explore:
My book, Let Your Fears Make You Fierce
Psychology Today – On Coping
Healthline – On Breathwork
Well + Good – On Breathwork Healing
Inner Truth – On Holotropic Breathing